New year

The month is just as new as a newborn baby. I have alot to accomplish. My whole body feels so heavy yet the urge to do big things and make a difference.
Done we all seek and get the answers. The magic of strong words and the saying that I was being told by em is still so fresh, I should have know all this was a lie, the pang of pain that I feel within me is very strong, strong that if it was to explode out I would kill million people. But hey time heals everything. Don't hold to your past. Just kick it.

Daily Schedule for Happiness

Follow the schedule and you will live happily ever after :)

The Journey

It all started in a fine day, restless as I was I had to set off, I had given up that one thing that kept me moving in town but all I knew was good things are coming my optimistic mind.....and yes I arrived to my destination, I will call it destination 1. Things don't seem to change ( thinking deeply) five years ago this place was like this am still is like this. What makes me sad is all tis young ladies most of them my age while others younger than me have kids and not married some just left school due to pregnancy or more just coz school was hectic, I really feel sad as I write this out, my head is pondering how can I help em, do they need empowering, or need to atleast learn how to use contraceptive pills and safe sex, that's Generation Y, I haven't realized why they rush into this stuffs while they have a bright future ahead if only they could be patient enough. But then what can you tell them while you as a parent can not afford to cater for them, I saw this neighbors children age btwn 3-4 all sty without food at lunch and eat dinner, and while the older ones age 11-14 go out and find ways to make end meet. That sad story is of a 14 years old girl who is now pregnant I wonder who will nurse who, am really touched by her, we friend if same age gave birth few months ago and well her mom is taking care of two kids. What has this world turned into? What can I do to make their lives better is one qns that I haven't got a clue to. Just few days of staying in destination 1 has made me realize that I shouldn't take life for granted and be grateful with whatever little I get. Am heading to destination 2, I hope this world is way better than any that I know.

Why I Write

Well I came across this book and after reading it I realized that of all the books that I had read its one of a kind. Google it and just read it you will be amazed by how writers know how to write.

Mothers Loves is Forever

For most mothers, the love they feel for their children is a strong and powerful bond that will continue throughout their lives. The love a mother feels for her child is the same whether the child was grown in their own body or in their heart, as when a mother adopts a child.

My children are dear to me and I find it hard to see them in pain. I feel like a

mother hen watching over her baby chicks. Children are tough in some areas, but always need to know they are loved, wanted and are priceless to us, at any age. Even when our children don't need us any longer to tie their shoestrings or to wipe their noses, they still need to know that we care. Often a child will not feel the impact of their mother's love until they become a parent themselves or their mother is no longer living. Then, the power of a lifetime of love their mother provided sets in.

To love and accept our children, even when they are driving us nuts and their behavior is horrid is most challenging. But the mix of unconditional love and loving limits are the most important duties and obligations a mother can have. Hugs and kisses are a necessity. Love can be expressed in many other ways too, including the discipline and responsibility we give to our children. Eye contact and a simple touch on the shoulder or a love pat on the back mean so much and cost so little. Try today to think of ways you can show your children how much you love and value them.

Here are a few demonstrations of love I have found my children are fond of. You can adapt these suggestions according to the ages of your child.

Outward expressions of affection for your spouse such as holding

hands and warm hugs are good examples of love and security you can give to your children.

Tuck little thoughtful love notes in their lunches, written on a napkin or

notepaper or under their pillow.

Saying a simple, "I love you!" A smiley face or you're the greatest!

Ask them to read to you - whatever they want - for 10 minutes.

Spend time listening - this is sometimes hard with an active lifestyle,

but more important than ever. Even 5 minutes can do wonders for a child's self image. Remember good eye contact is one of the keys. Pull yourself away from the computer or desk and sit with them face to face. Mirror their body language, moving forward as they do, or sitting on the floor with them.

For younger children even up to 10 years old, holding them on your lap for a minute or two might seem silly, but most kids miss the times when they were younger and were just held and comforted.

With my teenage son, I ask him to sit next to me as we curl up and watch a movie together on the couch. At 6'2," he rolls his eyes, but he likes it. Now, on occasion, he does it from habit, but not in front of friends. Big kids need hugs too.

Share in their hobby or interest. For example, skateboarding may not be your adventure at 42, but ask them about how skateboards are made. Look at what they can do - kids love to show off to their parents, so watch. Listen for, "Watch this mom!" Put down what you're doing and really watch and praise them for their effort. Encourage them to keep trying. Smile and verbally respond.

Surprise them by buying their favorite magazine without being asked to. Just put it in their room with a little note - Thought of you today! Love, Mom

Take time to lie on blankets on the grass at night and look to the sky for shooting stars together. This is one we do as a family each summer and always have fun, looking up and just sharing, telling stories - listening to the crickets and being together. We fall asleep under the stars until it gets so cold that we all run indoors, dragging blankets behind us. These are no more than simple memory makers.

On occasion we have a "backwards day", where we eat dessert first and then the main course; kids love it when their parents are silly at times.

My ten-year-old daughter loves it when I unexpectedly put fresh flowers in a vase on her nightstand, a surprise when she goes to bed.

Let them make their own family photo scrapbook - try color copying some of photos in your photo albums - this way you are not losing valuable photos if they cut them up. Old cards and gift-wrap can make nice backgrounds and borders.

The best way to let them know you care is to hear it from you. In our family, every day we say, "Did I tell you today that I love you? Well I do and I love you more than all the leaves on the trees or all the minutes you are on the computer." That will prompt them to respond with how they love me more than all the sand pebbles or the raindrops that fell this month. Even the big kids need to hear this. They might act as if they are annoyed, but it is sinking in.

Whichever way you choose to share your feelings remember to do something each day. Experts agree that if a child receives their nurturing inside of the family, they are less inclined to look outside to others that might have other motives. Create a home where love is shown. Any parents, whether rich or poor, can afford this.

These simple and free actions can have a significant influence on our children's daily lives that will last for a lifetime. The cycle of love between you as a mother and your child will be passed on to their children all over again. Stop and enjoy them now. Before you know it, they will be grown and this time will be lost

Love Last Forever

Elements of the fairytale experience can, and should, be a real part of a lasting, loving relationship. There's no reason that "forever afters" can't exist, and in fact, they should exist with the partner you call your spouse. True love is a decision of the will. It's a choice based on many factors, including that "in love" feeling you have for your spouse. Such a feeling can be built upon with tenderness, romantic gestures, and caring choices all along the way.
Can love last forever? Yes, indeed it can. Real love is made up of more than just that wonderful feeling that makes your heart go pitter-patter when you first meet. We might call that stage of love infatuation. True love doesn't begin until two people really get to know each other and from there build a stronger connection, loving rapport, and a lasting commitment. Such a relationship takes work, understanding, compromises, flexibility, forgiveness, good communication and much more. Chemistry is a part of it as well, but even beyond chemistry and the physical attraction, a love that will last forever is based on a strong decision to stay together.
Staying together is a lifetime commitment, but just staying together is not good enough. For true love to last forever, it requires two people to remain open, honest, and to change and grow not just individually, but also as a couple. As changes take place, a successful couple manages to flow with the changes, and love each other through them all. So, can love last forever? Truly, there's no reason for love to ever end!

Be Okay with Every Little You Have - Truth about Life & Thoughts

Time alone forces your mind to work and the things your mind chooses to mull and work on are the things that sometimes can scare you the most. My personal experience has been that the last 10 months have left me a lot of time to examine my life and where I'm at right now. I can view it in terms of what society tells me I should be feeling and happy with, and my own realistic view as it pertains to my everyday existence which tells me something entirely different.

My personal view of who I am has always been optimistic. I've viewed myself as someone loyal, reliable when it counts, but idealistic in the best sense possible. The life situation known as divorce has forced me to ponder something that I've always seen the results as an outsider, but never fully accepted as a part of myself; that is being selfish. The selfishness I've had to come to accept is not the kind I associate with material things or money. The selfishness I've concerned myself with, is the idea of happiness and how it pertains to my life.

Marriage is one of those subjects that has hit in all previous parts of my dissertation on great human beings because it was something that I thought would define my being as a success. This was the one area of life where I thought if I put work into, put effort into, I would never be alone again. I spent most of my time growing up feeling like an outsider, a loser, and awkward. I thought that if I found someone to love me for me, and I could swindle them into spending "forever" with me, that would be happiness. Married folks always tell you that it's hard work, and while you associate hard work with aspects of your life like your job, yard work, and working out, the work involved in a marriage is something completely different. The aforementioned aspects of work entail physical pain and labor. Marriage requires sacrifice & compromise and when you really analyze these things that are needed for a relationship; you don't factor in how much of you think you are that you will lose to this new entity known as the married couple. If your marriage is healthy and honest, it's a two way street where solutions come about by working together. In most situations, it turns out to be one standing and one falling and resentment builds up and infects all the aspects of what you originally got together for.

Tranquility to me insinuates a sense of calm well-being that comes about when being alone. But it was in these times that I was face to face with my flaws as a person. I wasn't perfect. The things that I perceived and valued as "good," also carried with them the realization that these same good qualities also made me weak. I've had to accept that I'm not a great leader, but a devoted follower with qualities that others at the top may not possess. Making excuses for yourself is something that comes with having an ego, but exercising honesty with yourself is something that pain comes with. There are things that present themselves that you cannot change or require a lot of work to make better.

After these thoughts percolate in your mind, you start to question the motives of others. It's like one giant paranoid scheme where everything that you thought was concrete or a pillar of your life has holes. You start to tear things down to see. It's at this time, I chose to rebuild. While my goal is to be honest, especially with myself, the element that is a fixed variable in this equation known as life is time. Like Pink Floyd sang about, the "ticking away of the moments that make up a dull day" is what makes up most of our lives. Was it a huge human flaw that I didn't want my limited time here to be defined by a marriage where I always compromised? When I first had the initial success idea that finding someone to marry would make me happy, the question of "what if things change and they create suffering" never came into play. To keep my family together, I tried to convince (LIE) myself, that this was the vow I took. For better or worse. But time was the nagging element that made me reconsider what my vows meant. Marriage is a partnership above all. What is a partnership where there is no respect? It's just one person taking advantage of the other. Did I want my time in life to be defined by that?

I'm trying to be okay with the fact that life/time is something that is okay to be selfish about. If I take my life and time back, I can use it for something and someone better who will appreciate the other "good" qualities I have and not take advantage of what I consider my heart. Most of all, I'm accepting the fact that the best investment I can make with my time is in me. To be alone with these thoughts and flaws so that I can create a solution isn't something to fear. It's part of who we were meant to be and discover.